Heaven or Nah?(the conclusion )

Taking my hand, this man who felt new and old to me, I let him lead me through the beautiful, forest. The sun, about three suns shone brightly. There was no darkness, no shadows.

Wanna know the super cool, mysterious inspiration for this story? Click to skip to it!

Then roughly, I am pulled tight up against him. Our naked bodies- whatever they were made of, felt a thousand times more sensitive than on earth. Many tingles rippled throughout my body, causing me to moan.

Suddenly it all came to me.

Tipping my head up with a finger, the handsome being drags his lips across mine like twin feathers rubbing against each other. His arms wrapped about my waist and then our lips pressed harder.

His mouth was a like a vacuum sucking me up into the feeling, into his lips and his touch.

Teeth, tongue, mouths wet clashed and clanged against each other full of unnatural want and need.

My heart, wherever that was, beat loud in my ears. My spirit was incendiary and instead of seeing colors. I FELT them.

“Who are you?” I asked after we pulled away. I had to gasp for breath. I couldn’t help but stare at and through this magnificent man. “I think I know you.”

The right side of his mouth curled into a smile. A wicked, sexy one. “You know me, Nanine. I am yours back there.”

My skin prickled in confusion and excitement. Both his large hands rubbed down the length of my arms. I made the mistake of looking into his eyes. Which suddenly looked like small, twin planets. In them and through them, I saw what looked like stars, bursts of light and a shadow of doubt and of love.


“Adin. My name is Adin.” He said wearily.

“Adin! The love of my life!??” My brain snapped back to the past. The white hospital room, the alcohol scent, sick smells, the wailing of my family. My boyfriend, Adin.

The cancer that ate my life.

I am dead. But what am I now?

“You are one of us.”

“Wait. One of you?” I pull back farther. I am happy to see Adin, but what was he doing here?

Once again, he heard my silent question.

“I am with everyone in their final hour, Nanine.” His brows furrowed. “I have always been with you. Exclusively in your last hours though.”

“No. We. We dated. We were planning to get married. Remember?” Sunlight began drift from over his face, slowly and his skin began to lose its glow., a beautiful shade of navy and purple midnight crossed his handsome features.

“We have been together some time, Nanine. I, particularly like you, but I am not what you’ve been thinking. You already know my name, don’t be afraid to say it.”

The words bubbled in my subconscious. His name floated on every wind trail, every cell of my body. It was in every kiss. Every whispered conversation.

Every look.

The name that was ancient and forever. An ancient forever name, an event no one can escape.

“The cold one. The one that should not have been. A perfect, exact non-discriminatory design.”

His eyebrow raised. His full lips twitched.

Death.” I said as the suns dipped lower and we were finally cloaked in darkness. I heard the humming of women and children. A gentle tune of sorrow and loss. But saw no one. It was just us.

He nods solemnly, his long brown hair and brawny body, lithe and muscular, shimmers and shifts to a more pale color, a design slowly crawls over his left torso, down his left rib cage. Ink. Ebony ink, in the shape of a huge, black scorpion.

Gone were the rainbows, the squirrels- life. We both stood in a dark forest. I did not hurt. There was no devil chasing me.

“You can move around however you wish here. There is a boundary you can not go beyond though.” He points behind me and up into the sky where I see a silver lining arc across the night sky.

“So this isn’t, heaven? Is there a heaven?”

“Heaven….” He comes over to me and take my hand. His feels like a solid block of ice. “Heaven is in your mind.”

“Then the churches and the bible was wrong.”

He did not flinch when I said bible. Wasn’t he bad or something? Evil? Did he believe in God’s word? Funny I should be this judgmental in the afterlife.

“Actually, darlin’ the bible is a snippet of stories woven together to tell truths based off of personal experiences. I can not say it is completely wrong, but your finite minds cannot grasp the whole truth.” He lands another soft kiss on my lips, surprising me by how soft and cold his kiss is. “But you accepted me and kept your mind open. Which is why you’re here.”

Adin went on to explain that others before me, made it here, but are in another location. Others who pass on, stay in darkness forever, their minds shut down. He called it ultimate hell.

With a thought, I wished it light again. I wished for the silver blue oasis of water and the birds and squirrels and it made my Adin happy. When I opened my eyes again…all had come true.

Unfortunately he told me there are men, women, and children whom he granted the Kiss of Death to and I felt a familiar pang in my chest. Could be jealousy, not sure. But I watch his naked back as it turns away and walks into the clearing of the forest, the ground lighting up as he walks his path and into some void I can not see. A path where he will collect more of the dying.

I wonder if I will be alone here forever…


©Copyright 2017 Ericajean

Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed the conclusion to my Flash Walk story.

***BONUS: What inspired me to write this story?***

A few years back, I had a dream that I was “trapped” in this wooden gazebo thingee. It was big enough all around but I could touch the smooth glass and peek through it looking at life all around me. Somehow, without anyone telling me, I knew I was dead.

The gazebo kept me encased where “the dead belong” but I was floating and there were others around me in these small gazebos.

Inside me a voice said, I can move about but not past the gazebo, because then my spirit would fall.

Anyway, hope you enjoyed this. Stay tuned for more blog posts and stories this month!



YA Summer continues with ‘Remember to Forget’ by Ashley Royer(a review)

Remember to Forget
Image courtesy of HarperCollins/Blink

In Remember to Forget by Ashley Royer(HarperCollins Publishing, April 5, 2016), Levi has refused to speak- ever since the tragic death of his girlfriend Delia.

The event was so horrible, that not only does he not speak anymore, but depression and anxiety has taken a toll on his mom and his friends, sending him from therapist to therapist.

Finally, Levi’s mom decides to send him to Maine to live with his dad. Leaving Australia will be daunting and Levi is sure  this will not help…

Until he meets Delilah.

And Delilah eerily reminds him of his late girlfriend.

Check out this quick interview with Ashley Royer now!

Quote from story against maroon background
Image designed by Ericajean using Canva


My reaction:


First off, when I  learned this book was written by a seventeen year old honor student, I expected nothing less than an emotional rollercoaster, especially given the backdrop of the story.

However, Ashley Royer created memorable characters and scenes that will easily resonate with teenagers and older folks alike.

Levi is a boy you just want to hold and tell him everything will be alright(but if you read the book, you will understand he does not want that). His depression and anxiety are so palpable that the story nearly pulled some tears out of me.

Second, Delilah is a budding rose of fresh air for everyone. She works in the place where Levi goes for his therapy session. Without giving away too many spoilers, I will say that Delilah and Levi did not hit it off immediately. Still mourning the death of his girlfriend literally controls everything Levi does and does not do.

Finally, the scenes.

Ashley Royer has created memorable scenes perfect for Hallmark cards and poems. From awkward airport moments, to hot chocolate and ice skating, her ability to write such believable scenes and characters and her control over pacing is astounding.

Other than some typos calling Levi “Luke” and other small nuances, this book is great enough as a compelling read for anyone battling depression, but looking for clean, sweet romance.

I highly recommend this one.

If you’d like to learn more about this Wattpad Sensation, please visit her at ashleyroyer.com.

This book was received as an ARC through Netgalley for my unbiased review.

Wake Up O’ Sleeping Stone

*Since April is poetry month, I will share what awakens the green-eyed one within me in verse…


Green Eyed Dragon
Eyes of Green Dragon by Avia Alceda

Still waters unbroken by terrific chaos

and all is well within this desert land

until one with more peaks, valleys and bountiful

beating hearts, blood coursed veins

continuous movement.


And now…


he moves no more, lying still

so very still, he is stoned,

vaulted in stone and carried away

reaped away by one whom we cannot see

but all must meet in that final hour.


How many deserves this fate more than he?


I can think of two, three…maybe twenty

who should take my father’s place

in that cold sanctuary, where meditation is



I envy you daughters! Sons! Who have your fathers

still in this world, heart beating and bleeding

and you are joyful for it.


This gem, this green jewel I will hold

but I am not sad

because we all must meet him-the one we cannot see

but not too early.

-By Erica J



Review of ‘Uninvited’, a book more psychological than supernatural despite the vampire

UninvitedUninvited by Amanda Marrone

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Uninvited surprised me. Even though it had a pretty good story from the protagonist’s POV and I was able to understand all her teen angst, shortcomings and crazy weird friends- it lost a star for, well…losing traction on the whole vampire thing, but even then maybe there was another story layer…

Jordan’s life is weird. Her boyfriend Michael slept with the entire student body and on top of that, she has a serious drinking and drug problem.

Then Michael dies and he still haunts her. He begs her every night to just open her window and let him in. Jordan knows how the myth goes: Never invite a vampire in. Well, the book makes it seem like he is a vampire and really it is hard to gauge if this is a vamp story or a story about a girl who lives a typical teen life with partying, failing grades and friends you can not trust.

Again, the story was good for what it was but it focused less on Michael and more on Jordan’s other issues: 1) Jordan’s mom is obsessed with looks and travels plenty with her new husband, 2) Michael mentions how Jordan’s friends don’t care about her and he is right about a few of them, 3) Jordan likes a boy named Danny who seems right for her but Danny is not one of those teens who gets wasted at parties-plus what would her dead boyfriend think?, 4) Jordan has a friend named Rachel who loves self help books and thinks she is the next Dr. Phil.

The vampire action does not really take place until the end of the book and should not be considered as the foundation of this book, just one of the plots. The foundation or core of the story is Jordan learning to take care of herself and speaking her mind, choosing to do what is right.

View all my reviews