The Essence of True Friendship-Missing My Father

Last Saturday, I witness the honorable burial of my father. He lost his battle to cancer Tuesday, December 18th but with a smile on his face. To some it would have looked cryptic, but to someone who knows God for herself, there was a new light in my father’s eyes and his teeth shone white. He had the brightest smile on his face and everyone is still talking about it.

However, I wish not to speak on the death of my father who raised me and my sister by himself and who worked so very hard for his family and others (the funeral was packed with hundreds of lives he’s touched).

But I’d rather discuss what I’ve learned from his passing on to be with the Lord. I already know that life is precious and “too short”, but my father was a true friend to everyone. Even to those whom others may consider different or misfits. You can call on him anytime and he would help. No matter what.

What saddens me is that I had to let a couple of friendships go two years ago because my Spirit was telling me: “A friend in need is a friend indeed” Do they care for you? Do you hang out together? Are ya’ll real friends anyway?” I had to say no to all of the above and it was hard. I asked my Consciousness: “Why should any of that matter? I knew these friends for years. No one did anything to hurt me. I can’t let them go just like that.”

A pretty interesting but true statement. No one did anything to me- yet no one did anything for me either. It is not about getting something from someone, because all I probably needed was a prayer back then or someone just to tell me, “Erica it will be alright.” But everyone had their own lives to get on with. Sometimes, a crisis on the other side is not the flame to burn in the other’s chest. We are instructed to carry one another’s burdens(Galatians 6:2 NIV).

There were others in my corner who I failed to recognize at the time. These folks cared about me and I cared for them. My husband, my father, my sister in law and others that have gone out of their way to make sure I was okay. This is how my father lived his life: He cared for his fellow people even when he was tired, even when they did not deserve a handout from him- he did it anyway.

So now I reflect on my self. These last seven days, I have wondered-Am I a good friend? I can speak about those who moved on and forgot about me, but what about my relationship to God and people?

This is my prayer: to be like my Heavenly Father whom my earthly father patterned after….

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